World Autism Day

Though they are seventeen years apart, from the time he was an infant, my daughter Jayde-Rhiannon and my nephew Stephen shared an undeniable connection. As Stephen aged, the pieces of the puzzle began to slide together.

It has been over twenty-five years since my son Brady was in Kindergarten, and I began volunteering in our school district. In that time, the world of Autism has come so far.

There was this little girl I regularly worked with. Not long into the school year, I remember asking her aid what she was diagnosed with. She brusquely responded, "We don't know. She is a tough nut to crack." The aid's response saddened and angered me. I quickly informed her that the idea of any child being described this way was unacceptable. 

When Jayde began Kindergarten, there were a few autistic children in her class. Two of the autistic classmates were sweet and responsive, while one was primarily nonverbal, headstrong, and occasionally combative. I quickly understood I couldn’t take her behavior personally. I treated her with the utmost kindness, patience, and love. Even on the most frustrating days, it wasn't difficult because I thought, if this was my child, how would I want them treated?

Thankfully, the aids in Jayde's elementary school were kind and patient, but I often wondered, with the wrong individual, would this young child have been described as "a tough nut to crack," or would she have been accepted for who she is? When Jayde was in 5th grade, we did an artist-in-residence week with the National Circus Project. Towards the end of the week, this young girl who rarely spoke when we worked together came running up to me exclaiming as she hugged me, "Miss Kellie, Miss Kellie, did you see me? I did it, I did it!!!" Afterward, I cried. I thought again about the ignorant comment from years ago by an impatient individual. 

Four years ago, we discovered Jayde was on the spectrum. We would soon understand neurodivergence is a common diagnosis for POTS and Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome patients. While research has only begun to scratch the tip of the iceberg, recent studies found a correlation between POTS and Autism, EDS, and Autism, as well as a crossover of the symptoms of the three disorders. This research and Jayde's diagnosis were eye-opening in assisting to make many things make sense. 

Two years ago, my nephew was diagnosed with ASD. Since his diagnosis, I've watched as my sister exudes patience I didn't know she had while she fiercely advocates for her son on a daily basis, whether it's with his multiple forms of therapy or finding a school that at its core is inclusive—instead of discriminatory. I watch her constantly fight for inclusion in a world not designed for her son. All the while knowing she is not hoping for a place where he is invited; she is wishing for a place where there is already space.

Here are some things to ponder on this World Autism Awareness Day. May we spread awareness that will foster acceptance that will, in turn, bring about appreciation and encourage action. 

The month of April is recognized as Autism Acceptance Month, but for individuals who are neurodivergent, this is a way of life that extends far beyond one month. Inclusivity, acceptance, patience, and compassion are crucial traits that shouldn't be attached to a ribbon. They should be a part of our everyday life. Though research and awareness have traveled so far in the neurodivergent world, it is obvious the world still has not come far enough. 

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